Hello my friends, I come before you today to announce a new beginning. A brand new day for the imperial guard. Its Morning on Cadia once again.
I've play imperial guard since 1983, when my 241-man space marine army was wiped out by a Tallarn truck bomb at a tournament in Lebannon. In that time, I've learned the best way to combat the evil Tau empire and its confederates around the Universe!
Previously, Imperial guard armies have operated around the principle of Mutually assured destruction. The Idea that victory can only be achieved by great sacrifice. I am here today to tell you that this is utter nonsense, propagated by liberal democrats and quiche eaters from the east coast. Their slavish devotion to the so-called welfare of hundreds of conscripts is a drain on our nation and its ability to make war. They opt to ignore the fact that most conscripts choose their station in life, and that to give them rifles or even body armor only encourages this behavior. Conscripts should pull themselves up by their bootstraps and become proper soldiers! These commanders deny their forces the technological resources to deter Tau agression.
In order to achieve total strategic superiority, we need to make serious cuts to the resources alotted for our infantry companies! Infantrymen only exist to protect other battlefield resources.
We will use the money save to purchase several of the new deathstrike missiles, in order to intimidate our opponents into submission. No commander with the slightest amount of common sense will every threaten us.
Every planet and every people has a stake in the Anti-Tau resistance, for these freedom fighters are defending principles of independence and freedom that form the basis of global security and stability. We must be the arsenal for those fighting this scourge, Irregardless of the potential consequences doing so may bring about!
Our commanders and sergeants are poorly paid because of a bureacratic political chain of command! We must eliminate this wasteful act of government intrusion, ensuring the battle prowess of our commanders is second to none. All Officers and sergeants should and must be able to equip themselves with the finest and most expensive equipment! Every sergeant and ever officer should be in possesion of a plasma pistol, a power sword, carapace armour, and all varieties of grenade! Front line troops should be encouraged to emulate these men as they would their fathers, rather than being handed supplies they will never know how to properly use them!! An exception to this principle can be found in the veteran and penal legionaire squads.
The Contras were more important to the cause of Nicaraguan resistance than our troops ever could be, primarily because they operate without that what has become so entrenched within the United State army. The same can be said for the Imperial Guard!
Battle tanks play an important battlefield role, but obscure our ultimate goal of unmanning the front lines. As long as they remain viable, Vehicles must meet the highest standard of technological prowess! Tanks should be given every sort of upgrade to intimidate the opponent into surrender!
Well I've said it before and I'll say it again — The Imperiums best days are yet to come. Our proudest moments are yet to be. Our most glorious achievements are just ahead.
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